Gardner-diamond syndrome: a real bruiser


'Who gave you that black eye?'

I guess I would once again put on my Super Woman cape and come to the aid of the odour distressed voices in my head.
“I am sorry. It’s me,” a shy voice answered. I looked around but failed to find the owner.
“Down here,” it said. At my feet a tiny syndrome lay helplessly.
“I am Fish Odour Syndrome. Sorry to trouble you, but could you please return me to Syndrome Lake? The odour will disappear if you do.” It was a disgusting slimy green colour and I hesitated to pick it up with my bare hands.
“Not to worry, a kick will do fine,” the voice reassured me. I kicked at it.
“Wheeeee,” it screamed as it plopped down into the lake and by Jove the smell had indeed dissipated.
Everyone applauded.
‘Excuse me, but none of the syndromes deserve this disrespectful behaviour! You are herby ordered to appear before the Syndrome Council within 24 hours,” the rude voice continued.
“And who the hell are you to issue orders? I am the one in charge around here,” the muse said and I could hear the sudden anger in her voice. No one had ever challenged her in this manner.
“Calm down, I was the one who booted the syndrome into the lake,’ I said. I hated conflict and felt that it rested upon my shoulders to calm the choppy waters.
“You me, me you we are interactive are we not?” I could not argue that this was indeed the case; she was my alter ego and I hers.
“Who are you?” she asked.
“Gardner-diamond syndrome at your service,” it answered haughtily. It could best be described as a giant bruise. Purple, green and yellow covered its entire quivering body.
“We have kindly allowed you to take up residence in this crowded brain and yet you dare to command me?” The muse was clearly on the war path. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the Lexicon Dragon, Sir Laughalot, the book worms and the Craggy Spiders run for cover.


About iread1966

Avid reader, published author, artist and pug breeder. Found out I could actually paint and write late in life, but whoopee now that I have found it I'm not letting go. Join the rollercoaster ride of creativity.

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