Introducing King Dimwit and family


king 2

As the muse will shortly be outing herself in the form of a book, I was stumped for new characters for the blog post which would be welcomed with open arms and would work as a replacement for the enigmatic figure. With her blessing she is stepping back to allow others their moment in the spotlight. I hope they make you giggle as much if not more than the muse.

Therefore meet Queen Gnol Gnireffus, which is basically long suffering spelled backwards. She has had a hard life; was forced to marry the inferior King Dimwit who was intellectually challenged and battled to understand most things in life and had a son who was so ugly that he shattered all the mirrors in the kingdom. She called him Prince Charming, he deserved something in life, and it might as well be a name. Charming he was not, neither was he handsome, hence the non existence of any reflective surfaces in the entire kingdom. He even cracked the Lake Woebegone in winter.
Queen Gnol Gnireffus forced him into the world with various grunts and groans and the prerequisite tub of warm water on a cold midwinter evening, took one look at him and subsequently fainted. Even then he was swarthy, had a hooked nose, unfocused eyes which tended to wander in their orbs, tufts of hair which grew haphazardly across his knobbly skull and skin which seemed oddly scaly. The midwife held him out to King Dimwit who merely grunted and took him out onto the balcony. He held him up for the populace to see. The king had watched Lion King a number of times and had always wanted to re-enact that particular scene. Now he could do so with his one and only offspring.


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